Really, Sir?

Crossposted: customers_suck

Note: Felt like posting this here, too.

__________


Have you guys seen this yet?

What is with all of the high and mighty jerks lately? What happened to those random rich people that would leave crazy tips and would be highlighted on the evening news.


Mostly list style, just because.

1) My fellow fatties, please don't bitch and give me that pissed off look because "lady cut" shirts don't come in your size. For one thing, I'm obviously in the same boat that you are in and I'm not complaining. For another, I don't design or produce these shirts. I can tell my managers all day long what we need, but they honestly don't give a damn what customers ask for when I let them know. It is only when YOU the consumer contact my company's corporate headquarters directly that things will change. (Maybe.) I advise you to do this and still you’re bitching at me. *headdesk* (I give this advice along with our corporate number, our web address, and the assurance that I write letters myself when something needs fixing. No dice.)

2) Dude who was in with a young lady this past Monday and had the balls to make inappropriate comments about my boobs, please do me the honor of fucking off. I politely told you off in the semi-light manner of a "sassy, Black woman," because my work environment allows us to do so. The fact that the young lady with you nearly died of embarrassment and kept apologizing should have been a clue that you’re a gross idiot. You made some half-assed apologies, but you still needed to gtfo.

3) People who call for directions or parking info. You need to listen when I ask you questions and provide instructions. If you’re trying to get driving directions, stop speeding down streets when you obviously don’t know where you’re going. I’m often busy when I answer the phone and I’m not your effing GPS. I don’t have time to "recalculate" directions for you, because you can’t take two seconds to pull the fuck over and look at the street signs. I am not psychic. I do not know where you are. I cannot help you if you don’t give me a starting point and you’re blowing through stoplights.

If you’re looking for parking, please pay attention. We don’t have our own parking, so there isn’t a simple parking lot I can direct you to. Stop being difficult and asking the most asinine questions you can think of. Our loading dock is not there for you to park long-term, so stop rephrasing the question. The answer is still, "No, you can’t park there. You have to (insert information I have already told you more than once)."

4) To the people who whine and bitch that we don’t have something, I usually try to tell you which popular items we’re out of right up front. Again, I don’t produce these products and can only relay what my bosses tell me. It is either out of stock and we're waiting on the manufacturers or we just don’t carry it anymore. Calm down, you will continue to live without your drumsticks, guitar handle coffee mugs, city shots glasses, medium shirts, spinning guitar key chains, etc.

5) Insert general sentiments about the nasty people that wreck the restrooms that I have to clean up after. I don’t get paid enough to clean up the following: fecal matter, urine, vomit, dirty bras, dirty underwear, soaked, muddy entire outfits, baby diapers, beer glasses/bottles, you get the idea. Just stop it, even though I know you won’t.

6) You should probably pay attention when I’m speaking to you. If I could hang out and not talk to you while still getting paid, I would. Little known fact, I’m not particularly fond of people, but I get paid to be nice and smile when you are a jackass. If I can make myself smile through most of the stuff horrid sorts pull, you can at least meet me half way and pay attention when I’m nice enough to tell you where important things like the restrooms are.

Pretty much every single restaurant I go to will take people to a table and won't interact with them. I, however, try to do the stuff I want from my dining experience when I go out. So, this makes me wonder why you can’t appreciate the extra effort me and my co-workers put in for you.

7) Please stop playing with my things. They are not yours and they are not toys. I do not come down to your office and look on your desk, touch your paperwork, or mess around with your expensive equipment. Kindly do me the same favor, because not only is this annoying, it’s just rude.

8) (Last one, I swear!) Here is a delightful fact, you can pretty much sit wherever you want. The restaurant's bitchy staff doesn't like it, but you have this option. However, it would make things easier if you weren't indecisive and/or bitchy about it. Shouting at me will not make me like you. I will just give you my fuck-you-with-a-smile, step back, and allow your entitled self to pick the perfect special snowflake table that calls to your very soul. I will then go warn the staff to be on guard for your crazy. If you're bad enough, I let a manager know right up front in case you try to get over on us via comps and complaints.

If you have any illusions that the staff does not discuss the crazies, you're nuttier than a NutRageous bar.

Imma just call it even here, because I've vented enough for every member of this comm. I really need to stop letting these things build up. o.o

My bad.

Comments

Oh wow, I think one of my old managers might have tried to manually add a tip to that or something, because of how low it was if the service wasn't bad or anything! Or done something! Called the guy at least. Because that is such a crappy thing to do. They should leak his name.

And I hear you on the people are assholes rant/vent. At first I thought the guy made a comment about your 'boots', and then reread it. If he'd been my boyfriend? He'd have been smacked and dumped.

I think everyone should work service industry when they're in high school or college. It would teach them manners.
I know that we can add a "grat," if the party is 6 people or more. I know that some servers have snuck a grat on to horrible parties, but that's only before the check is closed out.

I'm not sure what their relationship was. She wouldn't say, but she did say that it wasn't her dad when I asked. *shrugs*

They definitely should. There are way too many jerks in the world and people just don't get 'it'.

April 2015

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